One of the best tennis players in the 90s was Monica Seles. Monica grew up in Yugoslavia and then went to the Nick Bollettieri tennis Academy in Florida. Her dad was the coach that started her and that was with her for many years. He had a particular say with his broken English that stayed within the head coaches of the Academy for years. The saying was “you’re either chicken or not chicken”.
When we watch our children compete and play, the important question that we need to ask ourselves is: Are they trying to win or are they just trying not to lose? It is very important that all of our praising and reinforcement goes towards them trying to win with an offensive yet smart mindset. At the end of the day, the players that try to do this on the important moments of the match are going to be the players that win more (not always but more). Being aggressive with their serves; being aggressive when they receive short balls from their opponents; and being willing to come to the net on an important point are some of the things that will take for them to go on a positive manner level after level. It is important for us to understand that for a kid to master those kinds of skills (the skills of controlled aggression and willingness to take chances), it is going to require that they make mistakes. MANY mistakes in order to the manifestation of significant results. The influence that we have on our players on this regard is huge. I know because I am still impacted by the way my parents and the coaches who left a mark in my game and life. As much as our job is to teach them to play well, our job is to encourage and get them to play the game RIGHT.
In order to build on a game that will give them chances in the future, as coaches or parents, we need to identify two or three attributes from our players (these attributes can be technical, tactical, physical, or psychological), and we need to reinforce them positively to the players at all times. It is almost like a healthy “brainwash” because we are trying to create a clear imprint in their minds of where they should base their efforts under pressure, and the players who know what their strengths and attributes are will be the ones that will know what to do. Obviously, weaknesses need to be addressed and worked on to avoid leaks, but we will bring the approach to them on a different time.
Image by: Stacey Warnke licensed under the Creative Commons Attribution-Share Alike 2.0 Generic license.
